MEMORIES OF JAKE / Mommy
The first time he started to really smile was when we started pulling out the nasogastric tube during the day.
The face he would make when I gave him his meds, he would purse his lips like it was the worst ever. You had to really try and trick him into taking them; I had bought a pacifier that you could put meds in.
When I would give him his albuterol and pulmacort treatments, he would bat away the piece I had to place in front of his mouth. He always knew what he did and didn’t want.
To try and get him to keep drinking his bottle I used to walk him around the house, gently tap his bottom and sing some of the silliest songs ever!! (Be bop boo bop badda bahhh)
When we would go to get him in the morning, he would’ve unraveled himself from swaddling and sometimes be sideways in bed. Of course he would greet me with his smile!!!
On the changing table I would nibble on his neck and blow on his tummy, this was the first time I heard him laugh, it was so cute!
Jake’s hands and feet were usually chilled, this was due to heart defect and. I used to put new socks on him each day at the hospital, so he would be in only a diaper and socks. His second and third toes overlapped.
He had such an oral aversion from all the tubes being in and out of the hospital except when it came to toys and putting his hands in his mouth, he did this constantly.
I remember him falling asleep in his car seat when I took a shower one day. Usually I had to shower and keep him busy at the same time (because we couldn’t let him cry).
When I did try to take him in the car he would get so upset when I would strap him into his car seat. Nick’s preschool was only 8 miles away and I had to pull over several times to stop the crying.
He would laugh when you clapped his hands together.
Auntie Dena played the “how big is Jake?” game with him and he raised his arms up after playing several times (this amazed me).
Whenever I tried to take his picture or video him, he would stop smiling when the camera was in my face. Our best pic’s of him are when daddy is holding the camera so I could get him to smile.
In the morning when you went to get him from his crib, he would stretch his legs out and smile.
He loved when you patted him gently over his diaper area to fall asleep or to calm him. We would do this at the hospital and then when he came home too. He would fall asleep to this.
One night, I decided to give him a bath and get rid of his cradle cap (like he didn’t have enough problems!!). I put petroleum jelly in his hair and then scrubbed them off with soap; it took 3 times of washing his hair just to get the goop off his hair. Jake was sooooo good we couldn’t believe it, he didn’t cry and I think he might have enjoyed it.
After his cardiac catheterization in February, when we say him right after one of the staff had taped eyebrows onto his baby chickie toy. We have left them on and saved the toy!!(we never did figure out who it was I suspect one of the cardiologists).
Jake loved taking baths until he came out of the water then he’d let you have it until he was warm and cozy again.
We hung a Johnny jumper in our room and one time (he was only in it 3 times), Daddy swung him gently in it, he looooooved it and giggled /smiled.
Jake hated being on his stomach and seeing we couldn’t let him cry due to his heart defects he would last all of 30 seconds then start crying.
He would always get fussy part way through reading Nickolas a story.
Every time you fed Jake it was a struggle because he would tire out, lose interest or mostly throw it up and it would be hard to get him going again. BUT Jake never gave up and either did we. Before he died he was up to 3 ounces (at the age of 5 months) a feeding every 2 hours.
Jake looked so cute in his clothes, especially since half of his life was spent in a hospital in only socks and a diaper. He did NOT like hats!!(even though it looked adorable)
When Jake was alert at the hospital (before he was intubated the last time) he would cry when the nurses came near him, he was smart he knew he didn’t like what they were going to do.
I loved holding him cheek to cheek and the way he smelled.
I remember the first time he brought up his legs to his chest and pushed them out he was almost 5 months old and it gave me hope that he would eventually start hitting those baby developmental milestones. He was to start physical therapy.
I used to talk to him all the time and when he was 3 months old, I noticed him opening and closing his mouth at me when I talked to him. It finally dawned on me that he was copying me. Then he discovered his voice and we would baby babble back and forth. One time I went into the kitchen and he was one the floor under his activity gym and he would make a babble and wait for me to do it and then he would respond and back and forth. This is one of my most precious memories.
He had this toy that would go off all the time if it sensed anything it was a little puppy that laughed. It was so cute like him and it would go off even after he died and didn’t play with it anymore.
Selfishly, I loved the way only I could calm him down sometimes.
I will never forget how sweet he was nursing that first day and a half, I sure wish I would have reveled in it more.
He was sooo smiley!!!
Jake had an inny belly button, long dark eyelashes, soft, wispy brown hair(turning sandy brown/blond) and big brown eyes.
I loved the shape of the back of his head and the swirl on the back of his head, I would kiss it and call it, “my swirl”.
Jake did look like his brother, Nick, they had the same body as babies which included huge cheeks.
One morning, Jake was petting our dog Pete with my help and Pete leaned into Jake as if to give him a hug and Jake smiled so big, he loved it.
When we put Jake in the supersaucer, he would tip forward while trying to suck on his fingers, it was cute!!!
Jake had three visits to McDonalds (not to eat ).
Everyday, I was keenly aware of how serious Jake’s medical issues were it felt like it would be forever until his heart would get fixed. Our life was on hold until then, but I honestly thought Jake would make it, he was soo tough!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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